Harden conversation replies and prioritize newest candidates

docs/product-and-safety.md

@@ -19,7 +19,7 @@ The product has five connected goals:
 - Candidate inventory follows near-term outbound capacity and the recent-post window; discovery pauses instead of accumulating an ever-older backlog when accounts cannot keep pace.
 - Discovery is global while authentication, rate limits, conversations, and content remain account-owned.
 - Recipient deduplication is case-insensitive, durable across restarts, and protected by a live reservation during sends.
-- Remote side effects are fail-closed: a send is recorded only after the chat service confirms it; interrupted reply claims reconcile against Matrix history before retrying.
+- Remote side effects are fail-closed: a send is recorded only after the chat service confirms it; interrupted reply claims reconcile against Matrix history before retrying. A queued reply refreshes Matrix immediately before sending and becomes an auditable superseded claim if a newer inbound event or terminal state appeared while it waited.
 - Dry-run prepares and records decisions but never sends.
 - Operators can see funnel stages, account state, rate limits, failures, handoffs, and recent activity rather than inferring success from a process-health check.
 
@@ -41,11 +41,11 @@ Each subreddit snapshots a policy into a conversation when automation first hand
 | Mode | Meaning |
 | --- | --- |
 | `manual` | Never auto-reply; surface a human handoff. |
-| `legacy` | A short, bounded media-request flow retained for existing behavior. |
+| `legacy` | At most one optional autonomous media request, counting a request already present in the opener, followed by human handoff. |
 | `r4r` | Bounded rapport-style replies with autonomous safety checks. |
 | `r4r-media` | Rapport first, one bounded media ask, then a handoff/terminal boundary. |
 
-The snapshot matters: changing configuration later must not silently rewrite the rules for an active conversation. Automation stops for seller/upsell evidence, an image received, a detected boundary, unsafe content, an exhausted turn budget, or a manual policy.
+The snapshot matters: changing configuration later must not silently rewrite the rules for an active conversation. Automation stops for seller/upsell evidence, an image received, a detected boundary, unsafe content, an exhausted turn budget, a repeated media request, or a manual policy. Short refusals are interpreted in sequence: phrases such as “I’m good” become media boundaries only when they answer a media request.
 
 ## Success and analytics
 
@@ -56,6 +56,8 @@ Do not collapse all progress into “messages sent.” Useful states include:
 - replies, declined/boundary/upsell outcomes, and images received;
 - model usage, fallback behavior, strategy/sample size, and account ownership.
 
+Learning examples mature only after the conversation policy is no longer active. Full recipient history is reclassified on sync; a later decline or boundary overrides earlier reciprocal activity and removes any previously promoted example.
+
 Fetched listing size is not an eligibility count. Logs and UI should quantify rejection and deferral reasons so a dry funnel can be diagnosed without guessing.
 
 ## Operational authority